"Now I urge you, brethren, keep your eye on those who cause dissensions and hindrances contrary to the teaching which you learned, and turn away from therm."
-Romans 16:17
You may have heard the phrase, “Choose your friends wisely.” Or, “You can choose your friends but not your family.” At some point in our lives we’ve likely had people around us that we’d prefer not to be near us anymore because of their toxic, abusive, manipulating or negative personalities and behaviors.
As Christians, sometimes we tolerate this behavior from people when we shouldn’t, because of who they are to us. Whether it’s your friends, family, coworkers, etc. You have to watch other people and who you allow to be in your inner circle because what they have can rub off on you. Before you know it, you’re talking like them, acting like them, treating other people like them or allowing their angry or bitter attitudes to influence yours.
Stay away from people like this, as much as it is in your power becaus e if you’re not influencing them, they’re likely influencing you. The bible has few scriptures related to this:
“Do not be misled, bad company corrupts good character.”
-1 Corinthians 15:33
“One who walks with wise people will be wise, but a companion of fools will suffer harm.”
-Proverbs 13:20
Why is this a problem? Over time, toxic people can corrupt your character as a Christian woman and can open doors to worse things in your life. Secondly, if you’re dating/courting and then get married, who do you think will be the brunt of all of your ‘acquired’ personality flaws you picked up from these people? Your significant other.
Toxic people in your life can destroy your chances of meeting a great Christian man. How? Let me count the ways. You could be listening to bad advice based on someone’s personal negative relationship experiences and they’re influencing how you think, approach, treat and think about men so could you end up making bad relationship decisions because of their influence in your life, whether you realize it or not.
Your sweet demeanor and personality could gradually change due to a toxic friend who doesn’t speak to or treat people very kindly and this affects how you interact with men and how they view you. Over time, you may become unapproachable because of these toxic vibes you end up giving off to men without even saying a word. Now you’re at home, wondering why you’re still single.
If you are around someone who is angry, manipulating, bitter and so on and one day they mistreat you in some way to make you angry, what are you going to do? Most women will want to vent about it to whoever is closest to them and that usually ends up being your significant other if you're in a relationship.
If you’re not careful, the anger that person has can transfer onto you and cause you to be so upset, that you transfer that anger on to your significant other and cause a major blow up. If you’re courting someone, it could even cause them to leave you because they’ll feel like they’re seeing your true colors and that behavior is a turn off to a good man.
This is why you need to watch other people, even those who have been around you for years and protect your heart and your soul from their corruption. You are not obligated to share time with anyone who is mistreating you and spewing their toxic emotional energy onto you.
"When someone shows you who they are, believe them."
-Maya Angelou
Finally meet and marry the man God has for you. Marriage preparation and Godly relationship advice for Christian women. Order the book here: Irresistible: The Ultimate Guide to Marriage Preparation.
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