Could you be a narcissist or have you ever dated one? I’ve heard many women say they’ve dated a narcissist before, but they never seem to examine themselves to determine if they might have a few of these narcissistic traits as well.
You may have heard the phrase, “You are what you attract.” So let’s examine this personality type a little further to see if you might have some of these traits that you might be unaware of and how it could affect your relationships.
According to Dr. Jordan Peterson, a clinical psychologist, a temptation towards narcissism is a person with a high level of extraversion and a relatively low level of agreeableness, so you want that moderated by conscientiousness. Narcissists have the confidence of the competent without the competence, what they do is overclaim their contribution.
If you work with a narcissist, everything that goes wrong is your fault and everything that goes right is their doing and they will loudly proclaim that especially to their superiors and denigrate you like mad if you dare to offer a counter proposition. Narcissism is a camouflage strategy in some sense, narcissists pass themselves off as a competent and confident person and one way to elevate their reputation is to claim unearned moral virtue.
Social media has become a breeding ground for narcissists, especially women.
According to Wikipedia, narcissism is a self-centered personality style characterized as having an excessive interest in one's physical appearance or image and an excessive preoccupation with one's own needs, often at the expense of others. Narcissism exists on a continuum that ranges from normal to abnormal personality expression.
While there exists normal, healthy levels of narcissism in humans, there are also more extreme levels of narcissism, being seen particularly in people who are self-absorbed, or people who have a pathological mental illness like narcissistic personality disorder. The formal definition of narcissism also includes selfishness, involving a sense of entitlement, a lack of empathy, and a need for admiration, as a characterizing personality type.
Narcissists usually prey on those that have more of a passive agreeable personality type because they do not like to be challenged. If you have a tendency to lean towards men that have this phlegmatic personality type because they’ll let you do what you want and allow you to run the relationship, you might have a few of these narcissistic traits.
The reason a woman would intentionally go after a man like this is because she wants to have all the control in the relationship, what she says goes and she doesn’t want to be challenged or told what to do and the man will basically give in to avoid confrontation or arguments.
A man with a stronger personality type will not tolerate this and she knows it. The problem is, a man can only tolerate so much and if a woman acts this way in a marriage, it’s just a matter of time before the man will find a way to leave her. Whether he cheats to get out, flies off the handle and starts to abuse her, finds a way to get her to leave or just abandons her and serves the divorce papers.
If you recognize any of these narcissistic personality traits in you or if you were ever like this in previous relationships, you have to stop. You should seek the Lord and ask the Holy Spirit to change and transform you, because this behavior is carnal whether it’s learned or acquired through life experiences and it will be extremely damaging to a marital relationship. It may have been seen as “acceptable” while dating because the other person could just leave whenever they saw things they didn’t like, but with marriage it’s different and much more serious. Likewise, you should watch out for men that exhibit these narcissistic personality traits so you don’t end up in a relationship with a narcissist.
For dating and relationship advice, marriage preparation and more, get info about the book here: Irresistible: The Ultimate Guide to Marriage Preparation.
Like what we do? You can support us by Donating Here.
Subscribe to our YouTube channel and turn on the notification bell for more relationship advice.
Don't forget to sign up for our newsletter to be informed of more helpful content.
If you enjoyed this article, share it on social media with your friends!
Comments