Are you all dressed up with nowhere to go? Some women are literally all dressed up and going nowhere when it comes to relationships with the opposite sex.
All dressed up and paying more attention to their external appearance to the world while their inner life is a mess. For this type of woman, her inside loves her outside.
It’s the classic syndrome where your house is a mess but company is coming over and you shove everything unclean and unsightly into a closet, close the door and the house appears immaculate. The clutter never gets cleaned up, there’s still a mess, it’s just hidden from the world and tucked into a compartment where nobody knows it’s there but you, and at any time you can go and retrieve it. The world thinks your house is clean because that’s the impression you want them to have of you.
It’s unhealthy and unstable if you have issues that you are tucking away from the world and you dress it up with hair, makeup and a cute outfit. It’s also deceptive because you’re using your physical appeal to attract and lure in a husband but hiding from him everything that’s wrong with you. You can’t even begin to imagine the types of problems this can cause in a marriage.
Most people have something they’ve dealt with in their life, if yours is something that has festered for years, you may need to seek Christian counseling to help you get through it so you can get rid of it permanently. There is nothing wrong with asking someone for help. The Bible says, “Iron sharpens iron,” in Proverbs 27:17. Sometimes we need someone to help sharpen us in ways we can’t do for ourselves. Oftentimes there may be a spiritual lack in an area you’re dealing with that someone else knows more about and can provide the knowledge you need to be delivered. “My people perish for a lack of knowledge,” Hosea 4:6.
I know that many women make sure they look immaculate when they leave the house and this is a part of preparing yourself for marriage because you want someone to notice you. This is actually a good thing, but behind closed doors you should spend more time dealing with your personal issues.
"Do you have a temper, do you gossip, do you make unwise decisions, etc.? "
Take time to recognize if you have issues that a future husband would not want to deal with. Talk to close friends and family members who will speak the truth to you in love (male and female), you want to hear some tough love in this season because it will help you so much moving forward in a relationship.
Instead of paying so much money for that next outfit, wouldn’t it be much wiser to put that money towards resources that are going to benefit you personally and not just help you get married but stay married, such as books, counseling, etc.? Don’t let other women pass you by and get married because they took the time to invest in themselves and all you took the time to invest in was your next hair appointment.
Ladies, we have to stop being so shallow, educate yourself and understand what really matters long term in life and a marriage. Getting married doesn’t mean you’ll stay married. That’s the goal of course, but any woman can put on a pretty face, but it takes a true Proverbs 31 woman from the inside out to focus on what really matters and be the jewel of her husband.
I write these articles for you out of the passion of my heart because I know how important it is to be prepared as much as possible for marriage. I want you to get married and never get a divorce and I don’t even know you. I’m tired of hearing about Christian marriages failing and seeing marriages in the world thrive. It shouldn’t be so.
Deal with your stuff, get to the bottom of any character flaws you think you may have no matter how small. Little things get magnified in a marriage like you wouldn’t believe. Listen to the truth from people, even if it hurts.
“Faithful are the wounds of a friend; but the kisses of an enemy are deceitful.” -Proverbs 27:6
Finally, meet and marry your husband God's way. Marriage preparation and Godly relationship advice for Christian women. Order the book here: Irresistible: The Ultimate Guide to Marriage Preparation.
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